Replace Your "UM's" And "AH's" With This
Read Time: 3 Minutes
Whenever someone joins this newsletter, I ask a simple question:
Why did you sign up?
The most common responses look like this:
The Problem
The underlying theme behind these responses is FEAR:
- You add no value
- Your heart beat shakes
- Your voice feels unsteady
- You feel unsure of yourself without natural cues and body language, particularly when remote
And when you feel this fear, something unfortunate happens called the negative somatic feedback loop.
Your negative thoughts cause you to say filler words like "UM" and "AH" which in turn causes you to feel even more unconfident about yourself which causes you to say more filler words which in turn... It's a vicious negative cycle.
The more this gets in the way of your speech, the harder it is to pull yourself out of it and regain credibility in front of your audience.
The good news is that you can break the negative loop, and there are 2 ways to do this:
- You control your internal thoughts.
- You control your external behavior.
A few weeks ago, I wrote about how to do the former. In today's issue, I'll share a few tips to help you reverse course from an external perspective -- reducing those filler words -- so you can speak more confidently and clearly.
3 Techniques to Reduce Filler Words
Important note: Let's be real: we all use filler words. A few "um's" and "ah's" can actually make us sound more relatable. But when every other word is a filler -- particularly when we start speaking -- it becomes distracting and undermines our credibility.
1. Break the Conjunction Habit
Seven short words often lead to rambling:
- And
- Or
- Nor
- For
- Yet
- But
- So
These conjunctions tempt us into run-on sentences, creating more opportunities for filler words to creep in. Instead:
- Keep sentences short and crisp
- Start new sentences instead of connecting with conjunctions
For example, instead of saying, "I've been working on this project, but I am unsure whether this will be worth my time, so I decided to not spend as much time on it, for me to focus on something else," say:
Sounds strange, right? That's normal. You don't need to eliminate conjunctions in your day-to-day conversations, but you should practice this by yourself to hear and feel how tightening your sentences minimize fillers. From there, you can be more mindful of your run-ons.
2. The 2-Second Pause
Instead of filling silence with "um" or "ah," learn to embrace the pause in between sentences.
- Pause for 2 seconds before speaking
- Use silence to gather thoughts
- Treat periods as actual stops between sentences
Pro tip: tap your leg twice in between sentences when you practice by yourself, so you become more mindful of your fillers.
3. Tell More Stories By Reliving Scenes
If you loved to cook and were asked to share a 1-minute monologue about cooking your favorite dish, I bet you'd say fewer filler words than if you had to give a similar monologue about a topic you're unfamiliar with -- like astrophysics or bioengineering.
The principle applies to storytelling. We tend to speak more fluidly when we speak about ourselves -- personal stories -- and the ones that are easiest to tell are the ones in which we're describing specific scenes that we once experienced. The best speakers answer most questions with stories to keep their audiences locked in on them.
While we cover much more storytelling-on-the-spot in The Impromptu Speakers Academy, there are 3 impactful ways you can tell very short stories:
- Describe a key action: While playing at a charity table tennis tournament, I ripped my pants in front of 400 spectators.
- Describe a key emotion: I was terrified when this happened. I felt so embarrassed.
- Describe a key learning: From that moment onward, I vowed to never wear flimsy dress pants again to any tournament, no matter how unserious the competition may seem.
(That actually happened to me, by the way... LOL)
Bottom line: find more ways to say what you know so you'll feel more confident!
This Week's Action Step
This is one of my favorite exercises that we cover in The Impromptu Speakers Academy -- my 2-week blueprint to help you become a clear, articulate, and confident speaker.
It's called The Narration Game.
- Set a timer for 30 seconds
- Choose any object in front of you
- Describe everything you see and feel related to that object, without worrying about whether what you're saying makes sense (record yourself)
- Focus only on avoiding filler words by eliminating conjunctions
- Afterwards, count how many filler words like "you know", "um", and "ah" you said.
Practice once each morning and track your progress. This exercise not only slows you down but also speeds up your word retrieval process, making it easier to speak fluently in real situations. If you're curious how this looks, you can watch me demonstrating this in an older newsletter issue. See time stamps 1:35-2:58 in the video.
Remember, the goal isn't perfection. Even a 20% reduction in filler words can significantly impact how clearly your message comes across.
If you found this helpful, the Impromptu Speakers Academy is my 3-week bootcamp to help you become a clear and confident speaker at work. Reserve your spot today while they're still available.
Hope this helps.
Preston